Sunday, June 05, 2005

Breakfast Burritos

Either buy or make flour tortillas, and warm them if you like-I make mine because I like thick flour wraps. There are flavored tortillas which work really well for this, especially the spicy ones. Figure two for each person if they are really hungry.
The most basic form is scrambled eggs, cheddar cheese, and salsa. Wrap in tortilla.

To wrap a tortilla, place enough filling that it take up the space of a dollar bill on a salad plate, the long side of the filling facing you, the short ends to either side. It won't look like enough filling, but you need the extra tortilla space to wrap it. You are going to make an envelope shape. Fold the short side ends inwards. Holding the short ends down with your index fingers palms down, use your thumbs to fold one long end up over the top of the filling, so it looks like an envelope with filling in it. Holding that down, close down the flap of the envelope.

Serve with good coffee or tea, V8 or OJ.

The possibilities for fillings:
Guacamole (tons of it, mmmm!)
Sour cream
diced red and or green peppers
diced tomatoes
diced avocados
lettuce
bacon
sausage
diced black olives
diced green chilis

This makes a great 'day after the big party' breakfast. You can chop all the veggies and grate the cheese the day before, put them out in bowls or a big platter. Figure two eggs and two slices bacon per person, and a two spoonfuls of each topping for two burritos per person. Make each to order, or what we do is use our large japanese grill top and fry up a pound of bacon and a dozen eggs all at once and everyone builds their own. You could also fry up everything in batches and keep in the oven on low to keep it warm until everything is ready.

Last night Dave's cousins Greg and Andrew and his brother Steve came by. It was really cool because Dave is still gone to school, I miss him and we were all bored. We were planning to just have another night with the three of us, but the boys are getting on each others nerves lately. We watched Timeline first, Tom really like that movie, it is a more little violent than I like, but I really like the emphasis on history and archeology, which I think he would do well in.

We then sent poor Tom to be and watch Reign of Fire. What a crappy movie. I want two things from this movie. One, to see more dragons, and two, to see Vin instead of Matt McCaunaghy. Matt just didn't cut it for the bald, wise crackin' kick butt American. He looked ripped, but even with muscles he lacked the breadth of shoulder and natural grace of Vin, and his nasally voice just didn't work. The dragons were so cool, but you hardly saw them. They probably ran out of money, spending it all on propane to get the fire effects. If there had been more Dragons, I would have really liked the movie, even if the premise was lame and the acting mediocre.

Well after Nick went to bed we all started talking about Nick and how he is growing up, and how terrified I am that he will end up getting into trouble. It was interesting, because Andrew is in college, and felt his parents were extremely over protective. But he is a great kid and never got into the kind of trouble I did, and that I fear Nick will face. So which is the way to go-protect your child but have them resent you, or let them go and risk them getting into trouble? Andrew, being the intelligent one, says that there has to be some middle ground. I agreed, and told him so. He thinks that you teach the basics, and trust the kid, but I think that you need to also monitor things.

But what if you don't trust your ability to teach the basics? It isn't that I don't trust Nick, he has been very trustworthy, and certainly is far more self assured than I was. I don't trust my parenting. It took me a lot of years to get to where I feel I am a good parent, but all those mistakes were made on Nick. Is admitting I made the mistakes and trying to be better enough? Is there anything more I could do even if I wanted?

I also really want to screen him from a lot of this stuff for a few more years. I can't help but feel like if I can give him another 2 years to mature before he has to face these choices, that he will be better prepared to make good choices.

The other thing is that I do not trust other kids. Some of the things his friends tell me they have watched just makes me very uncomfortable. The Blade movies, Matrix 2 and 3, Resident Evil, etc. I think if the parents or grandparents don't monitor the things their kids watch, what else are they not monitoring? I just keep telling Nick to come here with his friends, and that way someone is around. I know they will get away with some things, but if I can keep them from having the space or time to have sex or do drugs, hen I am ahead of the game.

We have to have the sex talk with Nick. I gave him a book so he knows the basics, but we need to actually discuss the realities of sex-pregnancy, stds, false allegations, etc, plus reasons to wait. Dave says he will do it, but he is procrastinating as much as I am. We have spoken about drug use a lot, so I think he understands the realities of that whole thing. I will keep talking about it though.

Anyone have any sex talk stories?

My mom gave me a pamphlet on periods and said if I ever wanted to talk....Yeah right. She never explained sex, never talked about waiting, birth control, how to say no, nothing. I don't think she was abnormal for that generation, but it would have been nice to have some extra information to go on.

13 comments:

NYMOM said...

"The other thing is that I do not trust other kids. Some of the things his friends tell me they have watched just makes me very uncomfortable. The Blade movies, Matrix 2 and 3, Resident Evil, etc. I think if the parents or grandparents don't monitor the things their kids watch, what else are they not monitoring? I just keep telling Nick to come here with his friends, and that way someone is around."


Those are his peer though. His future neighbors, in-laws, co-workers, etc., The longer you isolate him from them, the harder it will be for him to learn to deal with them later when he's older and more set in his ways...

Is he the younger brother? Maybe it's why he doesn't get along so well with his older brother as he hasn't learned how to defer to authority yet (meaning older boys)...

I had five brothers so I know that boys need to learn to get along with each other and defer to the older boys, it's training grounds for learning respect for authority, age, wisdom, etc.,...

Girls, although some might argue, are just the opposite...they'll defer to everybody and anybody, so need to learn a little assertiveness...

I actually read they stopped the boot camp alternative for girls who get into juvenile detention for that reason...it really didn't do the girls any good as the psychology was entirely different...

Jen Kuhn said...

I never said I isolated him at all. What I said was that I do not feel comfortable letting Nick hang out at other people's houses when they allow their children such free reign. I offer for them to come here.

NYMOM said...

Oh sorry I misunderstood thinking you didn't allow him to have friends his own age...and he was just allowed to hang around with his brother...

NYMOM said...

Oh btw, I just bookmarked your page so I don't have to go back to SYG and look for your name to come here...I noticed you are posting less and less over there, so it's getting harder and harder for me to locate a post of yours to come here from there...

If that makes sense.

So I finally bookmarked it...

Jen Kuhn said...

Cool. Yeah, I am getting tired of it over there. At some point when the majority lets the minority dictate then it just gets foolish. That is really too bad, there are some great guys over there. I ran into Thea at your blog, she was really obnoxious at mensactivism, very in your face, lots of swearing, big chip on her shoulder, the guys loved her. Apparently she has had a change of heart now. Extremism (shaking head)

My boys are in many ways typical brothers. The older one is mothering, and bossy, the younger one was oblivious to it for years and hero worshiped the older one, and now is getting tired of it. The older on gets ridden more because he is older, the younger one gets away with more because that is what younger ones get. Nothing out of the ordinary. I have been trying to stay out of their arguements, but the older one just doesn't know when to quit, and the younger one now argues back.

The girls I have seen, with only a few exceptions, don't defer to anyone very often. They are really forward and sassy, but since they don't get physical they don't get in trouble. I think that is these last two generations of girls though, because the ones my age and older were not that rude and obnoxious for the most part.


So how were your girls together? Did they have issues together? How many years between them?

NYMOM said...

Well my daughters really had little to do with each other as they were 11 years apart...so by the time my youngest was about 5 or so, her older sister was 16 and interested in boys, clothes, friends etc...

Then at 22 my oldest had her own child and then was really, really oblivious to her little sister...

So no I never had fighting issues between them, age difference was too great...plus I NEVER used my oldest as a babysitter for my youngest...I think that causes a lot of sibling issues when older girls are forced into 'mothering' roles they are not ready for...so I never did that...

But surprisingly my youngest daughter and my granddaughter get along very well now ...even though the age difference is almost the same between them...one is 21, the other 9...and she frequent volunteers to watch her niece...so it could be an individual thing as well...

I think you are right regarding girls today..less apt to get physical, although very verbal...but I consider that a GOOD thing as using your words instead of your fists is to be preferred...

Regarding your boys I can see the fighting ending in a few years when your oldest is about 16...he just won't be so interested in bossing his brother around anymore as school, girlfriends, outside interests take up more of his time...

Jen Kuhn said...

I have come to the conclusion that words can be as bad as fists.

When the taunting goes on until someone snaps, who is the instigater? Both of them. Words cut deep, and can be more viscious than a punch. After all, a bruise is forgotten, but words can leave scars that last the rest of your life.

I do not feel that girls, being the ones less likly to throw a punch, are any less violent than boys. They just use different weapons.

NYMOM said...

But accepting that premise lets men off the hook for the many, many crimes of violence they commit...how can we do that????

It's actually very politically correct to accept this premise and leads to very dangerous precedences where boys who seriously injure others are given the same sorts of punishments as girls who yell at someone...thus, continues boys thinking that it's okay to hurt people, that it is equivalent to blowing off steam by yelling...and it's not...

People are human, when they get angry we have to expect them to do something...but society can deal with a yell, but to seriously injure others is a different matter altogether...

I often heard this argument when I first removed my daughter from the public schools here, although they have since changed their policy and NOW arrest teens who hit others in school (and most of those arrests are boys)...and I support this policy 100%...

I guess it's only when you, yourself, or one of your children is actually assaulted by some teenage thug that you'll understand that there is a BIG difference in someone yelling at you; as opposed to crossing the line and attempting to hit you...I find people outside of the city do NOT understand the distinction...

BTW, it's the first thing you learn in nursery school as 2 year olds are probably the most violent beings on the face of the planet...

YOU USE YOUR WORDS, NOT YOU HANDS WHEN ARGUING...

So this is a GOOD thing girls do and this behavior should NOT be discouraged...girls should be complimented for it and encouraged to continue it...not equate it with fighting and mete out the same punishments...

Anonymous said...

Yelling is better than hitting, to be sure, and I would never suggest equal punishments for verbal offenses and physical ones--I might support an arrest policy for physical assaults in high school, too. But I think we have to admit that girls can be extremely vicious in their own way and it's not the yelling but the barbs, the gossiping and rumor-spreading, the ostracizing, the labeling, the merciless picking apart of their targets. I went to grade school and junior high with what the teachers called a particularly mean bunch of girls (although I went to high school later with sweet and well-mannered ones). I saw how much they hurt the few that they chose to target, perhaps for life. While we shouldn't encourage them to express aggression physically as do boys, nor mete out the same punishments, they shouldn't be complimented for hurting anybody even if they're doing it "safely."

Anne

Jen Kuhn said...

That is the problem though. Because we view physical aggression worse than verbal, there is an inherant bias against boys. Verbal can be far worse in some ways. I think a no tolerance policy for both is needed, or let the kids deal with it. Disabling one group and leaving the other their weapons is not really fair.

NYMOM said...

You would have to go to a New York City school to understand the difference I guess...one is a danger and merits severe punishment, the other might be mean... but sticks and stones can break my bones, but names can never hurt me...

AND following your logic, the arrest policy for students who hit others in school would never have been instituted as parents of those students would have said, well you have to arrest girls for verbal abuse too, if you are going to arrest boys for physical abuse...thus NOBODY would have been arrested as that's the usual compromise...

Fortunately our mayor had better sense then to listen to them.

For there is NO comparison, none, between a girl talking about or yelling at someone and a boy who hits others...

I actually removed by daughter from a dangerous high school and homeschooled her myself for practically two years and it wasn't because girls were being MEAN, that I did it...

Of course my entire family, who all live in communities upstate with lovely schools were all horrified telling me she was never going to go to college, get a job, etc., etc., meanwhile she just graduated from a community college last Friday and is accepted into Baruch...a very good college in NY...

I find that people who live in nice quiet middle-class communities just do NOT understand what a really dangerous school is...and it's not dangerous because a bunch of girls are being mean to people...

Sorry, that's just the way it is...

Jen Kuhn said...

Tell that to the kids who shoot up schools. Verbal abuse is simply one end of a spectrum of abuse. It can be as devistating.

I wouldn't live in the city if I was paid a million dollars. There are no benifits which outweigh the dangers of that situation for me.

What do you think causes physical violence? Rational discourse?

If the verbal abuse is not tolerated, then the physical abuse will naturally go down. If the verbal abuse is allowed, then the physical abuse is just a hair trigger away. Trying to stop the physical is like paint over a crack when the foundation is shot. You aren't going to do any good, the crack is just going to keep coming back until you fix the foundation.

NYMOM said...

"If the verbal abuse is not tolerated, then the physical abuse will naturally go down. If the verbal abuse is allowed, then the physical abuse is just a hair trigger away. Trying to stop the physical is like paint over a crack when the foundation is shot. You aren't going to do any good, the crack is just going to keep coming back until you fix the foundation."


No, not at all...verbal abuse has nothing to do with it...as much of it is assault committed during the commission of another crime, such as robbery...for instance now we have kids being robbed on the subway fairly regularly for ipod and cell phones, it used to be for their jackets and sneakers and they are being robbed by boys for the most part, even girls are at risk now for these robberies as the items being sought are neutral and anyone can use your cellphone...

We got our kids the cell phones for their protection but now it's turned them into a target, so you really can't win here...

Some of it is racial...and white kids, especially boys, are at GREAT risk of being assaulted. It has nothing to do with verbal abuse as many of these boys never open their mouths in school...one of my daughter's friends actually described his day to me by saying to even make eye contact accidentally with one of these thugs could precipitate an attack upon him, just making accidental eye contact, not a comment but eye contact...

Like I said people who do NOT live here and put their kids in public schools simply do NOT understand...and as much as I've tried to MAKE them understand, it appears impossible...

You have to really live it to understand it...but arrest for a physical assault either in or out of school is the proper and correct policy to address this issue; it's not papering up the cracks but targeting thugs who could and often do serious damage to others in their community if law enforcement doesn't step in...

See I went to Catholic schools growing up and maybe in that environment you could do that whole girl/boy gender neutral verbal/physical assault thing...

It just wouldn't work here...as the issues are different and kids, frankly, more dangerous today...at least down here...